Note to Self.

It’s been so long, Throng of Followers. Miss me? Thanks. For the record, this post was originally written March 27th, just so you know.

I’ve missed coming here. This, after all, is my reflection pond. This is where I sit, pretend to crack my knuckles and write whatever comes to mind. I’ve truly been negligent and for that, I don’t apologize. Instead, I reflect upon the meaning of my writing here. I have left more and more time hanging between my entries (or posts, whichever you prefer), both for technical and temporal reasons. Technical, because I don’t have my own computer. And, as I think I’ve mentioned before, the computer I share with The Man is, well, a shared computer. And it’s inconveniently located. No intimacy here, except when I am alone in the house. That doesn’t happen very often. Oh – and the temporal reasons are just an excuse. I do have time off from work over 14 hours a day.

I discovered today that I need to be alone to write. I am not at home right now, as I am visiting family and have been alone all day. I kissed my relatives goodbye as they left for work this morning, and the first thing that came to mind when they closed the door, after deciding a second cup of coffee was a good idea (which it wasn’t, but that did not prevent me from having a third one later on) was hey – I could write today!

And so here I am. I don’t have a particular topic to cover, although the second thing I thought of after the coffee thing was a title for the post. Here it is, just for the hell of it: “On Self-Awareness, Denial and Apathy”. Yeah, that’s the whole thing. The whole thing is the title. I later (15 minutes ago, and seven hours later in the day) decided on “Note to self” because after all, and honestly, I think there are very good chances I will be the only one reading this post after it’s written. I know of two people who read Élucubrations. The others, if you exist, well, hello and welcome. And thanks for reading.

The other title I had thought of (the long one, remember?) actually had topics to cover in it. It was almost self-explanatory. I wanted to talk about Self-Awareness because of how I am – almost freakishly - aware of myself these days. I had a thing or two to say about Denial, because someone I know is neck-deep in it. And I wanted to write a few thoughts on Apathy, because it’s a freakin’ pandemic and I wish I could do something about it. But then I thought fuck it – too heavy.

News? Ok, news.

Nothing new, really. Except for my not-so-new kickass job. And Spring, too. Spring is here. And apparently, it’s here faster where I am sitting today than in Quebec City, two and a half hours away. With Spring comes my birthday: I turned 33 a week ago and it was a rather quiet affair, just the way I needed it to be. I received Wii Fit as a gift, which I highly recommend. When I plugged everything in the morning of my birthday (it was just like Christmas – I got to open my presents at midnight), the Wii actually wished me happy birthday. And I took a virtual jog in my living room with everyone who’s ever played with us. There’s something pretty cool to jogging along behind a small bobbing character (not too fast – you’re not supposed to catch up to them) and see the avatars of people living thousands of kilometers away wave at you as they jog along or meet you, running in the opposite direction. Of course, I did not want Wii Fit to jog. I’d rather do that outside. But I had to try it, and running in one spot for an extended period of time is not too shabby, cardio-wise. Of course, I am probably out of shape, not a good basis for comparison. I wanted Wii Fit for the yoga training, the ski-jumping and all the other fun things you can do. So voilà. I is a Happy Camper.

Happy Spring, everyone!