On Wondering Why.

I have been around the block too many times, at 35, to expect anything. I should know by now that when you have expectations, they are usually shattered. Not to be pessimistic, or anything.

But this time, I am hoping things will be different. I am trying to be free, to be happy, and to accept that not everybody is at the exact same spot in ‘Being’ as I am. It still hurts, though, when the person you thought was rocking your world is apparently not doing that intently or with purpose at all. What they are doing, though, is carelessly wafting through life. They have chosen (by their own admittance) to not make choices in life. They have chosen not to commit. You like their bohemian lifestyle, their carelessness. You like that they get up to go get chocolatines on Saturday morning, that they make chocolate coffee for you when you are still in bed and that their restaurant-owning neighbours have soup delivered to your door for lunch.

 

Your choice (and between the lines, mine, oh My Loverly Loverlings): to play along or to be stuck once again expecting something you feel you won’t be getting soon?  Argh. To be 20 again, and to not care about these things.

On Water Expeditions and Counting Birds.

After the umpteenth hiatus in my blogging life, here I am. I know you've missed me, I have missed you too...

So...let’s see. Oh! I went on a cruise to the Caribbean! It was magnificent. It was very touristy, but still magnificent. For my first trip as an adult, it was totally worth the investment! Not that I wouldn’t enjoy a Japanese/Hawaiian/Moroccan getaway...Oh Future! What holdeth thee in store for me?

I was with a very cool friend who had tastes similar to mine, and I’d go on a trip with her anytime, anywhere. You know, when it’s uncomplicated? Just like that. But that was SO long ago! Now, alas, autumn is upon us, my Cute Little Fall Blossoms, and I fear summer has taken its final bow, at least until next year. It was a good summer, though. But this fall promises to be even better.

There is this new thing showing its face, unexpectedly but with astounding great timing. I don’t know where it’s going. All I know is that it feels good. It speaks to me in a cryptic, complicated language unknown to me thus far. It pays for dinner when I extend the invitation, buys me some wine, and tells me my vanilla perfume is intoxicating. It counts birds with me when we are trying to fall asleep (sheep are too common). It seduces me via text messages. I am smitten. I am cautious, but smitten. We’ll see. Good night, Loverlies.